Well....

So the doctor now thinks that I'm under too much stress (who isn't?) and that the stress is stressing my kidneys which is stressing my liver which is causing an increase in my hives and skin sensitivity. He doesn't think I have a virus or any allergies - and he thinks my yeast levels are looking low. (He does all this with this machine and me holding something in my hand while he touches all the different pressure points.) I kind of had a feeling it was stress - it IS typical for hives to get worse when a person prone to them is under stress. BUT, it is also getting harder and harder to have faith that things are going to change.

I don't want to give up because I don't want to live with this for any longer than I already have. I also know that even though the hives aren't 100% better I feel so much better every where else. Like I've said before, I have more energy, my skin is better, overall just better. Sooo, for now I'll just keep plugging along and see what happens. I'm taking the new herbs for kidney and liver, sticking with my Threelac for yeast and staying on the healthy eating path.... I'm trying to be all organic now too, which I didn't start out with. It's hard because it isn't cheap, but I figure keeping any extra toxins out of my body can't hurt....Plus, my family if on board with most of it - so they are benefiting too.

Then I need to think about the stress part - I need to get back to meditating and finding some balance. It's tough worrying about money, taking care of your family, doing a good job at work, doing a good job with the things I volunteer for and then remembering to take time for me. Not that I'm not like 98% of women out there - how does everyone else find the balance? Is it just refusing to get stressed and doing it?

My friend Gretchen said to me yesterday, "I put it in perspective like this, if we all end up in a cramped apartment or trailer with out all the 'things' -we have our health and we have each other so what's the point in worrying." She's right and it's perspective of which I needed to be reminded. I forget that this stress is about "things." We have enough money to eat and clothe ourselves. We have enough to keep a roof over our heads. That's all we NEED. The wants will come again, I just hope when they do that I remember now and how much we really can live with out and still be perfectly happy.

On a less whiny note - today is pj day in my class -YAY! I'm wearing pj's and slippers, bringing a good book to read and sitting with my class and reading all morning! How can I complain? :-)